It's shocking to hear your child say rude phrases, even worse when it's directed at you. How do you stop this behavior???

It helps to know where these phrases are coming  from. There are several possible reasons why kids do this:

To feel like a grown-up.

When kids hear adults say these phrases it's always in an attention getting tone of voice. People react. Emotions are on high. The air crackles with static. Kids try out cuss words to see if they can create the same atmosphere and get the same kind of imagined respect. Younger kids are just playing mynah bird.

To get attention.

Once a child uses a bad word and gets a startled and immediate response from the adults around him he realizes what a powerful tool it can be.

To prove independence.

Kids are trying to prove they are separate from you, and that you don't control everything about them. Since you can't possibly control what comes out of their mouths this is an area where they may rebel, we seek refuge in Allah form our children rebelling against what we want that's good for them.

To gain peer acceptance.

Kids want to be accepted by their peers. Often, bad words is seen as "cool", so doing this is just a way for a kid to try to fit in with the crowd.

To mimic what they see in other people or in friends.

Kids are easily affected by their environment. If they have a "role-model" who does this, they will sure enough try it themselves. Try and monitor the type of environment you set for your child, make it has Islaamic as possible stories of the Prophet and His young Sahaabasl.Let this be their "role model".

What's the solution?

The first step is to review the reasons kids say bad words and determine which one is the fuel for your child's fire. Once you understand where this is coming from you can use one or more of these tools:

Set calm limits.

Often, a parents shocked response will actually encourage a child to repeat foul language. A simple, calm approach works better, "Yusuf, that is not a word which Muslims or children use. You may say "oh subhana Allah" instead." If the child persists, choose a quiet time to express your feelings, and set specific limits. Discuss why people say these words, define what the words are, and explain why they aren't acceptable in the Muslim character . Outline the future consequences for bad language Insha Allah - and follow through next time it happens.

Teach acceptable alternatives.

Some kids have a hard time understanding and expressing their angry feelings. Their lack of wisdom leads them to believe they are the only ones who ever feel this way, and that their feelings are wrong or bad. It helps kids when we allow them their angry feelings, even as we set limits on their behavior. As an example, when a kid is crying over a punishment, how many parents offer to "Give you something to cry for"? But the kid already has a good reason to be unhappy! A better response might be, "You're welcome to be angry at me - up in your room with the door closed." If the child then stomps off to his room don't yell at him for doing so! It's a healthy way for him to express his feelings. When an angry child curses at you, immediately offer an alternative, "That language is unacceptable. You may say, 'I'm so mad at you or I disagree with you.'"

Realistic expectations!

How do you act when you're angry? It's hardly fair to expect your child to respond to anger with a simple, "Oh no, I don't like that, or seek refuge in Allah from his anger." Kids are going to get angry. You need to teach, coach and model the correct ways to respond to those emotions. As long as your child is not using foul language or violent behavior, let her express her feelings out loud With correct sayings to help him calm down. Play the adhaan or recite surahs .

Praise good behavior.